one punch for all my problems

Budapest

Sat, 26 May 2012 19:17:40 GMT

_samalander and I were talking and she asked for my head canon about Budapest.

Clint and Natasha get partnered together and neither of them trusts the other. More than that, they just don't like each other.

Clint is too rough and unrefined. Natasha is too cold and opaque. No matter how far away from her Clint gets, he still can't see her.

They butt heads and while it never gets in the way of accomplishing a mission, it drives Fury and Coulson up a wall.

Coulson's been supervising them, trying to make the transition from independent agents to partners smooth. It's anything but. And having a handler on top of having to deal with each other makes everything worse. Coulson and Fury try everything they can to get the two of them to work together, but nothing works. They finally get the idea to send Barton and Romanov on a mission without Coulson, in the hopes that they'll be able to work out their differences on their own once they're a little more free from scrutiny from SHIELD. (Because they're both independent and have trust issues, because they both had trouble adjusting to SHIELD at first even though their difficulties were due to totally different reasons.)

They're given a simple information extraction mission, more suitable to a super newbie junior agent. They both know this mission is below them. Neither of them are happy about this so they go off comm and lose all the trackers SHIELD has planted on them/in their gear. Because of this, SHIELD is unable to get in contact with them when it's discovered that this whole mission is basically a terrible bloody trap in the making. Coulson takes some agents in pursuit, hoping to save Clint and Natasha because he doesn't want to take such promising assets (because right now they're still just assets to him, later they'll become trusted agents and then they'll become friends) back to SHIELD in bodybags.

Once they get to Budapest, Natasha infiltrates the enemy base while Clint is perched on a building adjacent keeping a look out. That's when everything literally blows up on them. Clint warns Natasha that movement in the base indicates she's been discovered, and then the building he's in explodes.

Natasha's able to hold off the enemy soldiers for a while but she's outnumbered and there are only so many people she can fight when it's her against too many. She manages to lock herself in a room with a computer and attempts to get the information she went in there for. The information isn't there. The enemy mostly evacuated while she was hacking their system. They blow up the building while she's in there.

She and Clint find each other, both of them bleeding from too many wounds, only to find themselves surrounded by enemy troops. They figure they're already dead, so they may as well take as many of the bad guys with them as they can.

A fight ensues (obviously).

By the time Coulson finds them, they've managed to take down a good number of the baddies and have escaped and found shelter. They both survive (obviously) but are severely injured and it takes a long time for them to heal and be cleared for the field again.

Clint thinks the whole thing was a clusterfuck and that Natasha being in a blown up building was his fault. It's the worst op he's ever worked. He also worries that because he didn't like her that he did less than his best job of looking out for her. He makes a promise to never do that again.

Natasha knows their only fault lies in cutting themselves off from HQ. She actually considers that the fact that they took out so many of the enemy troops without dying means that the whole thing was pretty damn successful. She doesn't blame Clint because she knows he couldn't have seen any of it coming. He saved her life. She hates him for it because now she owes him a debt. (He insists he doesn't, and when she's adamant about owing him a life debt, he says he can buy her a drink and they can call it even. She buys some vodka the moment both of them are off painkillers and they get completely smashed and yell at each other, but none of it is meant maliciously.)

After that they get along. Mostly because it's hard to hold a grudge against someone who had your back while your innards were bleeding out all over the ground.

(Everyone thinks Budapest is when they started sleeping together but that came later, until it didn't anymore, and by then they knew how to work with each other well enough that it never came between their partnership.)

Neither of them ever drops out of contact with SHIELD on a mission again (unless required to), but they still both rip their trackers out of everything SHIELD gives them.

(Budapest is also when Coulson stops looking at them as just loose-canon assets, and starts seeing them as capable agents who can function without supervision, but that's a story for later because this is about Clint and Natasha.)

After Budapest, it takes a while, but eventually they start opening up to each other about their lives outside of SHIELD. It's mostly in drunken post-misison confessions that are never spoken about afterwards, but it happens. They also bond over a mutual love for freaking the fuck out of their coworkers.

Fury and Coulson almost regret putting them together because once they start getting along they are a holy terror. The only thing that keeps them from full out hating the two of them working together is the fact that they're one of the most successful teams in all of SHIELD's history.

(Coulson's secretly very proud of them.)

...and I think that's all my headcanon about Budapest.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Safe and sound

Thu, 17 May 2012 05:26:58 GMT

Bernard is home now. Thank you all for your kind words and concern.

He was up a (very tall) tree in the neighbor's backyard. He was chased up there by their dog, and I think he was too scared to cry out at first.

Finally, tonight he cried out and Mom heard him. We thought he was next door, but after hopping the fence (they didn't answer their door, probably because they were sleeping) and looking around we realized he was actually one more house over.

Up a freaking tall tree.

He was high enough up, and close enough in color to the tree, that I don't think we would have ever seen him if he didn't call our.

We got our tallest ladder out and Chaney climbed up and then went up almost another ladder's length in the tree and got Booboo. As soon as he got a hold of Booboo the poor cat started pissing a rain storm. I don't think he'd gone at all since getting up there. So all four of us (Chaney, Mom, myself, and Booboo) got drenched in cat pee. Chaney had a hard time maneuvering in the tree with Bernard under his arm, so I climbed up to grab Bernard and take him the rest of the way down. (I legit forgot I was scared of heights until I reached the top of the ladder and then I was just too fucking determined to get my goddamn cat that I swallowed my fear and got shit done. It was pretty awesome.)

Then it was inside for food and some much needed bath time.

I texted Lauren because she asked to know when Booboo got home. I hadn't realized that it was so late though. Sorry, if I woke you up.

And now Bernard is on the bed, purring and tongue bathing and being super cuddly.

I really fucking love this cat.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Tue, 15 May 2012 03:14:53 GMT

Bernard is missing. He hasn't been seen since around five this morning. I've spoken to neighbors and gone searching for him around our street. Tomorrow I'm going to call the nearest vets and rescue groups.

While I was looking for him, I saw a black cat that looked similar to Blacky. We never found Blacky after he disappeared. I'm really scared we won't find Bernard.

I just want my fucking cat back.

From tumblr

Fri, 11 May 2012 19:38:06 GMT

Okay guys I am bored at work, give me fic prompts.

You may get a few sentences, you may get several hundred words.

Fandoms I'm familiar with for the new followers (totally not comprehensive, if you've seen me post something from something not listed, I am probably familiar with it):

DC Comics (esp. Batfam, Green Lanterns, and the various sidekick teams, but I could probably write a little bit about most characters)
Marvel cinematic universe
(that awkward moment when you forget what fandoms you are familiar with)
Harry Potter
Star Trek TOS/AOS/TNG/DS9/VOY
Doctor Who
The Hunger Games
Legend of Korra
Young Justice (tv and comics)
Aaron Space
(okay it is really embarrassing to forget what fandoms you are into)
(boredom is killing my brain)

Lauren already requested something with Hawkeye and I responded with (what else) a Batman crossover.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Shimmy shuffle 'round

Fri, 11 May 2012 17:00:28 GMT

I've kind of been absent from the internet lately because I had a pinched nerve in my arm and it hurt like a bitch, so I didn't really feel like doing much scrolling/typing/being online. I'm all better now though so here is a huge textdump post on my life.

The bakery training was simple and boring. Most of it was really self-explanatory. There was a really hilarious moment when the trainer who came in from the Las Vegas HQ started getting teary-eyed over the history of the company. Training was Saturday and Sunday, and we opened up on Monday. Things seem to be running pretty smoothly.

Other than the hiring issues I mentioned in my last entry, the bakery is actually a really nice place to work. Everyone is really nice, including the owners (leading me to believe that they aren't actually aware of the fact that I'm the only non-white front of house staff they hired which is actually very sad), and all the customers who have come in so far are very happy about us and love our cakes. I think the hardest part of the job is opening the refrigerator/cooler and that is mostly because I have little noodle arms with no strength. Story of my life.

The job is relatively simple, and I really enjoy wrapping the cakes up in cellophane and decorating them with doodlebob things. I'm hoping to sweet talk the frosters into teaching me how to frost cakes, because I'm getting kind of bored since I've already figured everything else out.

All of the cake flavors that I've tried so far are really good too! I bought some itty bitty ones for Mothers' Day for Mom. Well, they're from Chaney but he doesn't seem interested in getting her anything for Mothers' Day, so I had to step in and get something awesome in his place. I also got my mom some flatware to add to her set (butter knives and a cake server) and I'll be cooking for her and giving her breakfast in bed.

Yeah, I'm kind of a badass daughter.

I am increasingly frustrated with my brother's lack of desire to help around the house. I've worked a week straight with no days off, and my mom recently hurt her back lifting heavy stuff without assistance (she tried carrying a heavy stone bench in our back yard by herself; I yelled at her a great deal for it and told her that she should have asked for help), so I've been doing everything around the house. My brother apparently can't because, "I just want to relax when I get off work!"

Yeah. 'Cause I don't want to sit on my ass at all.

So yesterday I worked six hours at the bakery, did some grocery shopping, went home to clean litter boxes and water the plants, ate dinner, washed dishes, cleaned the floors, showered, and fed the cats. I also waited on Mom when she got off work so that she wouldn't have to bend over/do too much that would aggravate her back.

He...made himself dinner, went to the gym, and left me with all of his dishes to wash.

I am getting really sick of his supposed inability to do any household chores. Lately he can't even be bothered to load the dishwasher, and just piles all of his dishes in the sink so high up that I have to empty the sink in order to wash dishes. Is it really so hard to put you plates and cups in the dishwasher? He doesn't even have to turn it on! Just put the stuff in there.

The only reason it bothers me is because he still has the gall to tell me that I don't do anything and I'm useless, when I'm doing all of his shit for him. I just want to grab him and shake him. It's so frustrating.

Last night we had a thunderstorm and the lights went out. Bernie got so scared and came into my room and sat on my desk crying. I tried carrying him into bed with me, but he just growled and squirmed until I let him go. And then he ran out of my room to go wake up Mom.

He's been really upset that I've been out of the house so much lately. I think the worst part of the pollen season has passed (at least as far as my allergies go), so I'm going to try to get back in the habit of walking him. Probably immediately after getting home from work. He's had a lot of excess energy lately, has broken almost all of his toys, and has started waking us all up at 3 in the morning by screaming and throwing things off my desk.

And while I'm struggling to keep this little guy happy, Kourtney is trying to foister another (really fucking adorable) kitten on me. Guys, I cannot manage any more animals. I want to, I really do. But I can't. I just wouldn't be able to afford all of the litter.

I do wish I could though, because I think Bernard would benefit from having a playmate with him 24/7 so that he wouldn't have to wait for me to be at home/not exhausted for playtime.

And on top of Bernard going all bananas, Todd has been really needy. He's started following me around and nipping at my ankles and feet whenever I'm not talking to/petting him.

This would be easier if I wasn't the only one who played with the cats.

I've been rewatching Greek. Casey and Ashleigh really need to ditch the boys and just make out already.

I think I'm going to go on a little shopping spree with my next paycheck and load up on cardigans because I want/need more. For reasons. I think I'm also going to get a paid dreamwidth account. I was waffling on it, but I really want all of my icons there. And I'll be able to afford it since I won't be renewing my paid LJ account or getting a paid Neo account like I thought I was.

I'm due for a new phone soon. Mine has been crapping out, and since I don't have a land line I really need to have a good working cell. I'm kind of bummed because I haven't seen any phones I really like lately. I'm really super bummed I broke my old Samsung Propel because I loved that baby more than I have any right to love a phone. I'd really love to go back to using it. I've been looking for something similar, but haven't found anything that's really caught my eye.

(Ugh how come every time I sit down to write an entry lately it ends up being me complaining about everything? I swear I'm actually pretty happy lately and not always so miserable.)

I am super excited for Hogsmeade to get started. Right now I'm counting down the hours. I'm training a new girl at Fall Creek. She mostly has the hang of things, so I left her at the front desk and am hiding in my coworker's office and dancing to fake pop rock bands.

I am kind of the coolest fucking bitch you will ever meet and I really love it.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

This just in--breaking news!

Thu, 03 May 2012 23:55:03 GMT

I may or may not be ridiculously excited for this movie.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Livejournal, come on.

Sat, 28 Apr 2012 15:06:12 GMT

Originally posted by _samalander at Livejournal, come on.

Originally posted by zeitgeistic at Livejournal, come on.

Alright, I am not drunk enough to deal with this, so I'm just going to put out this PSA:

Livejournal Scrapbook is going away and will be replaced by the mysterious "Photo Album". Your 10GB of Paid Member space is now 2GB. If you care, there is an explanation in Russian on the Russian news page. There's also a user-submitted translation.

+ You will no longer have access to your Scrapbook once this goes live.
+ Your images will redirect, but the URL will be different.
+ Unable to tell what will happen to any photos you have that put you over the 2GB limit.
+ Back up your Scrapbook just in case.
+ If you want your photos transferred over now instead of waiting, let them know here.

I've never used scrapbook, but I know some of you do, so this is a signal boost.

Because it came up and I thought it might be relevant

Fri, 27 Apr 2012 23:50:05 GMT

Here is a fantastic intro to tattoos for anyone who might be interested. I know a few people on my f-list have mentioned wanting to get one (or more) at some point in the future, so I thought y'all might find it helpful.

Meme from Kitty

Wed, 25 Apr 2012 15:35:23 GMT

I am a cuddler.
I am a morning person.
I am an only child.
I am currently in my pajamas.
I am currently pregnant.
I am left handed.
I am a little shy around the opposite gender at first.
I bite my nails.
I can be paranoid at times.
I enjoy country music.
I enjoy smoothies.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I have a car.
I have/had a hard time paying attention at school.
I have a hidden talent.
I have a pet. (more like six)
I have a tendency to fall for the “wrong” guy/girl.
I have all my grandparents.
I have been to another country.
I have been told that I have an unusual sense of humor.
I have or had broken a bone.
I have bathed someone.
I have changed a diaper.
I have changed a lot over the past year
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
I have had major/minor surgery.
I have killed another person.
I have had my hair cut within the last week.
I have mood swings.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I have rejected someone before.
I like the taste of blood. (okay this sounds really bad, I swear I'm not sparkly)
I love Michael Jackson.
I love sleeping.
I love to shop.
I own 100 CDs or more. (over 200)
I own and use a library card. </strong>(nope, because I can't be trusted to return them)
I read books for pleasure in my spare time.
I sleep a lot during the day.
I strongly dislike maths. (why is this a thing? This shouldn't even be a thing.)
I was born in a country other than the UK.
I watch soap operas on a regular basis.
I work at a job that I enjoy.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I am currently wearing socks.
I am tired.
I love to paint/draw/sketch/sculpt. (doesn't mean I'm good at it though...)
I consume at least one alcoholic drink every month.
I have/had:
Smoked cigarettes.
Rode every ride at an amusement park
Collected something really stupid.
Gone to a concert.
Helped someone.
Spun turn tables.
Watched four movies in one night.
Been dumped.
Taken a college level course.
Been in a car accident.
Been in a tornado.
Watched someone die.
Been to a funeral.
Burned myself. (it was an accident! be careful with ovens, y'all!)
Ran a marathon.
Had my parents divorce.
Cried myself to sleep.
Spent over £200 in one day.
Cheated on someone.
Been cheated on.
Written a 10 page letter.
Had a best friend.
Lost someone you loved.
Skipped school.
Got in trouble for something you didn’t do.
Stolen books from the library.
Been in a mental hospital.
Watched the “Harry Potter” movies.
Fired a gun. (not a real gun. It was, like, a laser tag gun)
Been in a school play.
Been fired from a job.
Taken a lie detector test.
Swam with dolphins. (I swam with whales, but fuck it, it counts!)
Gone to Sea World.
Attempted suicide.
Written poetry.
Read more than 20 books a year. (I've read more than 20 in a week....)
Gone to Europe.
Loved someone I couldn’t have.
Used a coloring book over age 12.
Had stitches.
Taken a taxi.
Had more than 5 online conversations going at once.
Had a hamster.
Dyed my hair.
Had something pierced.
Got straight A’s.
Had my parents send me to a shrink.
Been handcuffed.
My hair is naturally the colour:
Light brown
Medium brown
Dark brown
Blonde
Black
Dirty blonde
Strawberry blonde/Ginger
My eyes are:
Brown
Blue
Green
Grey
Hazel
Light brown
A combination of things
I am a:
Male
Female
[There should be more options here] (yes, there should definitely be more options here. Let me just add this third option for everyone else:
some other, entirely awesome gender that is not listed here)
People sometimes label me as
Slut
Girly
Ugly
Nerd
Other
My longest relationship was __. (including on and off relationships)
1 month or less
2 months
3 months
4 months
5 months
6 months
7 months
8 months
9 months
10 months
11 months
A year+
Two years or more
I’ve never been in a real relationship.
Some of my biggest fears are ___.
Spiders/other insects
Dying
Doctor/dentist appointments
Hospitals
Needles
Disease
Being alone in the dark
Heights
Small spaces
Oceans/large bodies of water
Holes
Large animals
Small animals
Dying young
Open spaces
[do we seriously not have "bad things happening to my loved ones" here? I thought that was everyone's top fear]
I have ___.
A friend with benefits
A computer in my room (a laptop, which is in whatever room I want it to be)
A television in my room
Good grades
My own car
Married parents

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

LoK, YJ, etc.

Sun, 22 Apr 2012 17:16:25 GMT

So why talk about MY LIFE and what I've been (not) doing, when I can talk about ~fandom things~? SPOILERS BELOW. You have been warned.

I read a really great, albeit short, opinion about Amon and how he isn't really a bad guy in the traditional sense. He's seeking equality for everyone, which is a pretty noble cause. The way he's doing it may not be super awesome, but his base cause is one that people normally have no problem getting behind.

It got me to think...we really don't have any non-benders in the new series to give us their view on the way things are. So far all of the non-bending characters have been bit characters or Amon and his people. We've got no one on the new Avatar team to provide us with that point of view. Last series we had Sokka, who was in almost every episode. But the main characters in LoK are all benders. I realize we're only three episodes in, but it'd be nice to have someone who isn't clearly ear-marked as an antagonistic force to give us some insight.

Other than that, I really have no complaints about LoK. As I said on tumblr, I feel like Mako is the Tuxedo Mask to Korra's Sailor Moon. She keeps saving him and he's totally okay with that. He's not bothered at all by the fact that she's a girl and she's so much stronger than he is. It's pretty fucking awesome.

I was doing some thinking on Mako and Bolin's backstory, and while I realize that the physical differences (Mako is tall and lean, Bolin is shorter and stocky) are probably to make the characters more distinguishable for younger viewers, but I have an actual in-story head canon for that. Mako's clearly worked hard to protect and care for Bolin. It's been implied that they've struggled in the past for shelter and food. And for having such a hard life, you'd think that both of them would be on the leaner side, or at least have a similar body type. And yet Mako's visibly thinner. It's now my head canon that he has skipped the occasional meal to better provide for Bolin, not just out of a sense of brotherly love, but also potentially because of guilt. Their parents were killed by a fire bender. Mako is a fire bender. He probably feels like he has to overcompensate for what Bolin's missed out on (having a family/mother and father who could take care of him) and for the fact that he is basically their parents' killer.

Also, theory: maybe Mako was the fire bender who killed their parents? Maybe he was just starting to learn fire bending and lost control and somehow torched their home/parents? I mean, I think that's pretty hard core for a kids' show but it's very interesting that Mako has this connection with whoever killed their parents. I can't help but wonder how that makes him feel blah blah blah.

Okay I loved it. The whole damn thing. I'm excited for next week. I am freaking out over Roy/clone!Roy blah blah blah omg they were missing for sixteen hours blah blah blah

but

okay I am probably thinking too much about this

but

anyone else bothered by the way they paired everyone off? And like, it's not even that they were paired off that bothers me. It's the actual choice of couples.

They've got the two aliens together (Superboy counts as an alien because he's part-Kryptonian and does not understand being human despite the fact that he was programmed with knowledge about humans), all the white kids are together (Robin/Zee, Wally/Artemis, and yes Artemis counts as white because she is mixed but she does not present as Asian imo, only white), and then the two black characters (Rocket/Aqualad).

Idk...as the product of a multi-racial household it struck me as incredibly bothersome in a "you stay with your people and I'll stay with mine" kind of way.

Imo Robin and Zee were always going to be together if either of them dated other team members because they're the closest age-wise and they both understand what it's like to lose family. And they've been giving us Supermartian since day one. So those guys were already spoken for.

But the others weren't. At least, not definitely. Wally and Artemis have been skirting around something, but it didn't necessarily have to happen. And Rocket was seemingly attracted to Kaldur immediately, but you know. That doesn't mean it has to happen.

Personally I think Wally's still too misogynistic for a relationship with Artemis. And I'm very bothered by the fact that he just scooped her up without any reason to and without her permission. He just decided that her body was going to be where he wanted it to be.

I think the only reason this is really bothering me is because there have been small things, from the very beginning of the series, that have clearly made it so that even though the girls are some of the strongest characters on the show, they're still just objects to be attained by the guys. And while it hadn't disappeared totally, that sort of thing had lessened as the show had progressed. But this seemed to just enforce that thinking.

REGARDLESS I am hella excited for season two. Babsgirl! Cassie! Bumblebee! JUST GIVE ME ALL THE LADIES!

In other news, and to ensure that spoilers aren't at the bottom of this entry so that you can comment without being afraid of seeing spoilers, last night Mom picked me up after she got off work and took me to meet a lady who was selling a shitton of comics. I bought about $20 from her (Power Girl! Phantom! Zatanna! GLC! Brightest Day tie-ins I never read!) She said she had way more that she wanted to sell, but that she needed to go through them first. She said I could email her a list of titles/creative teams I was interested in and she would pull those aside for me so I didn't have to go through her stacks searching for them. She was super nice and I'm very excited to see what she has.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

doop doop doop

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 19:23:43 GMT

View Poll: #1835315

Hands up and touch the sky

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 03:11:02 GMT

- bullet points because lazy

- had a bad few days but that has passed and today was much better

- basically: fuck my grandmother, she's a bitch

- got a second job at a bakery. Mostly working the front end stuff like the register. I get hourly + commission on the retail deco crap I sell. I also get to help out with some of the simpler decorating

- this is a bakery that only makes bundt cakes. what the ever loving fuck.

- I need to buy new clothes and shoes for the job. Yay~

- first day of work is May 2nd

- I have Avengers feelings. Accidentally got spoiled and it sank my ship harder than the Titanic.

- Heroine Big Bang wasn't going to happen. Now it is, but it's going to be a Ginny-centric mini bang. Am v. excited

- Avengers Big Bang art is coming along nicely.

- I have been posting a lot of fic at AO3, but not cross posting because lazy.

- apparently I like Nicki Minaj. I don't even know what my music taste is anymore.

- Ultimate Spider-Man is really awesome. You should watch it if you like superheroes.

- Watched JL:Doom. The pacing was a tad off, and I really hate the way Clark's head seemed super...idk flat? Anyway ew. And he and Bruce looked too much alike. But I loved the voice acting and omg Diana ♥ Amazon after my heart, she is.

- I am craving gummy sharks like whoa

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Happy Easter! + fic

Mon, 09 Apr 2012 00:46:18 GMT

Happy Easter to those of you who celebrate it. I hope your day was filled with delicious sweets and fantastic egg hunts.

Here is a vaguely Easter-ish story for those of you who would like to read something festive: Hear the bells ringing... (Avengers, Clint/Coulson) on LJ/AO3 (Warning, it was mostly written at 3 am. Don't read it if you hate ducklings.)

Hope the rest of your day is swell and occupied with a sugar-induced coma!

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

There is nothing wrong with your television set...

Sun, 08 Apr 2012 04:24:57 GMT

Do not adjust the picture. We now interrupt the regularly scheduled Wah Wah Wah Fest for a special announcement:

I am now going to tell you about the proudest moment in my life because this blog is getting too damn depressing.

Once upon a time in a galaxy not so far far away, wee little Emmy enrolled her ass in a geology of Texas class. (Okay, that was actually last year but whatevs. I'm still wee and little.) A large part of this class was a week long field trip to west Texas to stare at rocks and fossilized pieces of shit. Also giant worm tunnels. (Hello Tremors!)

During this field trip, the class spent two days in Big Bend National Park. Spoilers: it's an awesome place, and you should try to go. Now wee little Emmy had been dreading this trip. Sure, she loves herself some shitty ass motels and long ass drives, but wee little Emmy isn't as strong as she used to be. She was kind of concerned that she wasn't going to have enough moxie to keep up with her able-bodied classmates.

But here's the thing: wee little Emmy has more moxie in her small toe than the rest of her class combined. Not only did she keep up with the rest of them, she was at the head of the pack. All week. It was pretty damn awesome.

But that's not the proudest moment of her life. No, that moment happened on her last day in Big Bend, just after hiking back from Balance Rock. You see, wee little Emmy has a bladder that is proportional to her body. Meaning that just like her, it is a wee little bladder. But when you are doing a shit ton of hiking in a desert, you kind of need to drink a lot of water. So wee little Emmy had drunk quite a large amount of the stuff since the class' last pit stop. And now she kinda had to pee. And when I say "kinda had to pee," I really mean that she had to pee really fucking soon because otherwise she was going to wet her pants. Which would be highly embarrassing since she was in college and an hour away from the crappy motel.

This was when she got a brilliant idea.

She turned toward a fellow classmate and asked him, "How'd you like the hikes today? You think you drank enough water?" Oh yes, he had. And so had everyone else in her van. In fact, they all had to piss pretty damn badly. So it was with great gusto that she suggested they pull over so that they could all take a piss. It was agreed upon, and all of the guys stumbled out and ran several feet away to do their business. And wee little Emmy climbed out and did her business too, leaving a small part of herself in a national park.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the proudest moment of my life: pissing in a national park.

Also, it was pretty damn cool when we were all back on the road and all the guys said they were sorry I didn't get a chance to pee. And then I got to educate them about the fact that us ladies too can pee wherever we damn well please.

This entry has been brought to you by the fact that I drank some alcoholic something the size of my head tonight called "The Painkiller." Idek, but it was coconut-y.

(And now you know why I never drink.)

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Sat, 07 Apr 2012 17:02:18 GMT

DEAR DUMBASSES:

There is a reason my back is to you. There is a reason I am facing the OTHER WAY. Approach me from the FRONT. If one more person comes BEHIND MY DESK and TOUCHES me to get my attention then I will punch you. My desk faces the door. It isn't that FUCKING HARD to take three steps and come at me from a direction I can see you. I am working, but I am not some animatronic doll robot. Just because I'm on the clock does not mean you have permission to violate my personal space.

Also, all of you are adults. If you want a pen, use your damn words. Don't reach over and grab one OUT OF MY HAND WHILE I AM USING IT.

Also, when you came in to ask me what time we closed you walked through a door. That door has my hours on it. Slow down and take the time to notice what you're walking by.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Seriously? No, seriously?!

Sat, 07 Apr 2012 01:32:20 GMT

*eating dinner*

Grandmother, turns to Chaney: "You are so handsome. You are so lucky to look so good. Some people are so ugly." Looks at me. Turns away and goes back to talking to Chaney.

Gee, thanks.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

What is writing?

Fri, 06 Apr 2012 20:11:39 GMT

(AKA: WHY MEGAN SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO WRITE WHEN SHE IS DOPED UP ON ALLERGY MEDS)

prompt:

The Avengers decided to have an Easter egg hunt for Thor. Or Thor someone convinces them. Or Tony does it for Thor as a joke. But, it is a thing that happens.

Only, they use real eggs. And the eggs were fertilized.

So Coulson does what any self-respecting man would and collects all the eggs and blackmails Tony into creating an incubator and hatches them. And becomes the mother to ducklings. Lots of ducklings.

Clint of course makes fun of him, but really there is nothing cuter than an Agent of SHIELD being followed by little balls of fluff. Who wouldn't love that?

"Wait, wait, wait...what do you mean you've never done an Easter egg hunt?"

"In Asgard--"

"Yeah, yeah. That's nice. We get it, you're an alien god. I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to him." Tony's drink sloshed and threated to spill over as he waved his arm roughly in Clint's direction. "You are not an alien god. How is it possible you've never been on an Easter egg hunt?"

Clint shrugged. "Guess it was never at the top of my childhood priority list. Better things to do."

"There is nothing better than an Easter egg hunt--"

"Tony," Steve blah blah blah

"That's it, I'm throwing you an Easter egg hunting party. Pepper--"

"I have more important things to do than plan egg hunts, Tony."

"Like what?"

"Like running Stark blah blah blah."

"I don't even want an egg hunt. It sounds stupid. That's kid stuff."

"Clint, it's a rite of passage."

"Tony, he doesn't want to do it--"

"Clint, I want to do this for you. Let me do this for you. I feel as if it is my personal responsibility to see to your upbringing."

"I'm an adult, Stark. There is no upbringing for you to see to."

Bruce leaned toward him. "It might be easier for you to just give in and let him get it out of his system."

"I too, would like to experience a hunt for the eggs of Easter! Surely it will bring us much honor when we are succcessful in our quest, Hawkeye."

"See? Thor wants to do it. That means it has to be a good idea. We're going to have an Easter egg hunt in honor of your deprived childhood and in the name of good diplomacy. Thor, you're in charge of the eggs. I'll bring the drinks."

My favorite part is the blah blah blah.

Okay now to take a nap and hope that I feel more alert when I wake up so that I can finish this and replace the blah blah blahs with real words.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Hello Livejournal.

Sat, 31 Mar 2012 23:11:24 GMT

Sat, 31 Mar 2012 21:37:08 GMT

Hey guys! Just a heads up: there is a super fun Let's Get To Know People on the Internet Meme going down here. It's totally awesome!

TW: discussion of race and casual racism

Tue, 27 Mar 2012 17:31:17 GMT

When I was a kid, my friends and I were really into the Animorphs series. On the playground we would act out scenes from the books. One of my friends, I'll call her C, was always Rachel. Rachel was described as a fierce blonde warrior chick. She was the one always chomping at the bit to go beat some Yeerk scum. As a girl with blonde hair, C was the obvious choice to play Rachel. It didn't matter that Rachel was my favorite character, and that the two of us shared a fighting spirit, as a brown-skinned, dark haired girl I was clearly not Rachel material. Instead I was clearly Cassie material. Cassie, the love interest. Cassie, the walking library of animal information. Cassie, the one who doubted whether they were doing the right thing by fighting. It didn't matter that Cassie was quite clearly described as African-American and that I was not. The simple fact that I was dark-skinned and dark-haired obviously meant that Cassie and I were exactly the same.

Never mind that we weren't.

Never mind that I am half Mexican and half Asian. Never mind that my hair was long and I was fierce. By not being white, by not being blonde, I wasn't suitable to be at the front of the pack in the battle. I needed to hang back. I wasn't leading lady material. I wasn't good enough to be my favorite character.

Now that I'm older, I can appreciate the character traits that Cassie has that seemed weak to me then. I've realized that compassion and knowledge can be just as powerful weapons as fists and fierceness. But as a child, all I understood was that my skin color and my hair color, my lack of blonde hair and light skin meant that I wasn't as worthy as my friend C.

Why does this matter? What is one girl's inferiority complex in the grand scheme of things? Well, it's not much to anyone but me. But when you multiply that one girl by all of the children in the world who faced similar treatment growing up, you end up with a world populated by adults who were told time and time again over the years that they didn't deserve to be heroes. That there was no room in society for them as anything other than sidekicks and b-listers.

This matters because this puts every single one of them at a disadvantage. This situation takes the young, impressionable mind of a child, and imprints it with the knowledge that no matter what kind of adult the child grows into, no matter what kind of accomplishments this child achieves, this child will never be good enough to be accepted as an equal within the society that it is expected to function within as an adult.

This idea, that the child has no power in his or her life, is enforced by years filled with book, television, and movie protagonists who never look like the child.

But that's the beauty of books, you say. You can imagine that the characters look however you want!

Yeah...except not.

Because you'll be hard-pressed to find a picture book geared towards younger readers with illustrations depicting non-white characters. And right now, there is a huge trend in Hollywood of adapting books into movies. Movies lead by white actors. With a mostly white cast.

Do you know what's worse than being inundated with images of people who don't look like you and being told that this is how everyone looks and something must be wrong with you if you can't relate to them?

Finding a character with which you feel a strong kinship with, and imagine looks just like you, only to be told later that no, the joke is on you. This character is clearly white, was clearly always intended to be white, and what is wrong with you that you could not pick up on that obvious fact?

But you know. What does it matter? Why is it important to have equal representation of all races within literature and media?

This matters because once upon a time on a playground a little girl was chased while a little boy taunted her with cries of "Chinese! Chinese! Chinese!" until she was in tears. And when she went to a teacher to try to get help, the teacher's only response was, "Well, it's true. You know it's bad to tell, now go back and play." Because this teacher saw nothing wrong with that boy using "Chinese" as an insult. Because this teacher didn't care to find out if the girl was even Chinese at all because the girl had slanted eyes so clearly she had to be Chinese.

This matters because when faced with questions about why non-Caucasian actresses were not considered for a role in a movie based on a book in which the protagonist is clearly described in a way that allowed for her to not be white, the response was that hair dye and make up could reconcile that issue. Because applying a few non-permanent cosmetic changes to a person is considered to be the same thing as casting someone of a difference race.

This matters because when people of color speak up about this, about the fact that mainstream media seems to think that a spray tan is no different from being born with an entirely different skin color, and that saying that makes us angry and hurt and offended, we're told to shut up. Because a good actor can play any role regardless of the color of their skin, and we're being racist ourselves by asking for equal representation.

(But that ignores the fact that actors of color are not afforded that same thinking. Actors of color are not allowed to be simply be good enough to play any role despite the color of their skin. They are allowed to be Good Black Actors and Good Asian Actors and Good Latin@ Actors but they are not Good Actors Period. They are reduced to play caricatures, best friends, and sidekicks--if they even get a speaking role at all.)

And now I have no idea where I'm going with this. Because when I started this, I meant to write an essay about my personal experiences with racism and my feelings about it. But it's quickly (d)evolved into a criticism of society and the way mainstream media and literature represents (or doesn't) people like me. Because I can't separate one from the other. My feelings and experiences have been shaped by the society I live in. And right now, what society has to say about me...well it isn't so much what is being said, but what's not being said. Because society says I can't fight the monster, win the prize, and save the world. And while that has a tendency to, on my worst days, make me want to curl up in a ball and sob, usually it just makes me want to punch things. Which kind of proves that society and mass media are grossly incorrect about me and my superhero status.

In writing this, I'm not asking for sympathy or even attempting to suggest a solution (because as fun as it is to say, you really can't just go around punching people/things without serious legal consequences). But I felt like this is something I needed to say, for personal reasons, because I've reached a point where not only can I acknowledge the racism that surrounds me, but I can also discuss it (mostly intelligently). And as I've grown into this place, I've learned that many other POC are not comfortable having non-POC in that conversation. But I feel like it's necessary. I feel like excluding a potential ally from the conversation will do more harm than good, and that open discussion--between POC and allies, where we all listen openly to the experiences of each other--can be cathartic and can help each of us grow and move forward. I know not all POC feel this way, but this is how I feel. And I want you all to know where I'm coming from. And I want you to know that if at any time, you want to discuss anything about race/racism with me, you can feel free to come to me. I can't promise that I'll always be in a good place where I'll be able to talk about it, but if I can then I will. Because I can't punch every problem I face, but I can surround myself with smart and ambitious people to help me fight in a more socially acceptable manner.

And because saying I'm open for discussion without providing simple ways of contacting me is kind of pointless:
LJ/DW PM or a comment on any entry in my LJ or DW
AIM: infiercepieces
Jabber: emmypenny@livejournal.com/
MSN: emmypenny@live.com
Skype: supernovagrrl
Email: emmypenny at live.com (This forwards to my personal email, which I am not putting here since this entry is public. If you have my other email address, feel free to use it. If you want it, feel free to ask for it and I will send it to you privately.)

or my tumblr askbox: official-which.tumblr.com/ask
(There is a character limit on what you type, but this allows for you to be anon if you want. I sadly had to disable anon commenting on my LJ because of the ridiculous amount of spam I was getting, even with Captcha turned on. My DW does allow anon comments though.)

And if you're in Houston and would like to get together to talk about this or anything else irl, feel free to reach out because I'd love to talk to you about anything, even if it is just cats and/or fandom things.

(Apologies if this seems disjointed in any way. It's taken me several days to type this up and at this point I'm kind of sick of looking at/editing this and just want to post it.)

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

May the odds be ever in your favor

Fri, 23 Mar 2012 08:29:46 GMT

Okay super quick Hunger Games review before I crash because I may still be kind of wired from OMG SODA AND CANDY:

THINGS I DID NOT LIKE/CRITICAL BITCHINESS:
- why is the future so white?
- why were the Careers all white with blond hair?
- how come when the riots started in the districts, the first person shown acting out was AN ANGRY BLACK MAN. REALLY? REALLY? FUCKING REALLY?
- I understand budget but I am sad the rest of The Capitol citizens were not as fabbed out as Effie
- Why were all the Tributes except for Rue and the dude from her district white? WHY.
- Both Mom and I were unhappy with the action sequences and felt like the violence was too glossed over. We figure it was so that the rating would make the movie accessible to its/the book's target audience, but we were still disappointed because we like bloodbaths apparently
- The tracker jackers looked like mosquitoes to me rather than wasps. Sadness.
- I wish Katniss and Peeta had been more on fire in the chariot if that makes sense.
- Caesar did not spin Katniss. I really wanted him to spin her.
- I did not care for the music
- They cut out the Mayor's daughter what's-her-name. I liked her.
- I feel like the movie did a disservice to Peeta. My mother did not read the books and she walked away feeling like he was a traitorous ass instead of an incredibly naive golden boy, which is how he came across to me in the books
- I am very sad that Katniss never got Rue's District's bread
- The cave scene lost its intimacy for me. The whole thing felt very awkward and forced.

THE GOOD:
- Mom does not trust Peeta. She thinks he is no good. I lol'd.
- I loved the starkness of District 12 in comparison to the lushness of The Capitol.
- Really great costuming and make up and blah blah blah
- I really loved seeing more of Seneca/how the Game was run. After seeing the movie, I would totally love to know his back story.
- The muttation dogs were fantastic. I literally got airborne when they showed up and once my wee little ass hit my seat again I climbed as high up in it as I could.
- Foxface's casting was PERFECT. That was exactly how I saw her in my head.
- I loved seeing how the Gamemakers and Districts reacted to the Game.
- Wtf why is Haymitch hot and not such a bad drunk? Idk why but yay for hot Haymitch
- CINNA
- I felt like the stuff that got cut did not detract from the story, although I do feel like the movie tells a different story from the book because of some of these omissions. Not extraordinarily different, and not in a bad way different though.

There was one moment, in the cave, where Peeta rubs the ointment on the cut Katniss got from what's-her-name's knife. It felt really awkward to me when I read it, and it felt even more so watching it. I ended up laughing and that set my mom off and we spent the next fifteen to twenty minutes trying to stifle our giggles because we couldn't stop. I really loved that the scene (as well as many others) brought about the same/a similar emotional response from me as they did when I read them in the book.

Overall I was underwhelmed though, and I feel like it did not live up to the hype, either from the book or from the advertising, and I do not feel like it was worth staying up to watch at midnight. It was average. A nice way to pass the time, but not especially memorable and I would not want to see it again.

I am however, looking forward to seeing the other two films, because I feel like this movie did a very good job of setting up a road for those to follow as far as bringing in new fans and keeping the old entertained. The source material was honored pretty well (if you ignore the extraordinarily white version it told) and after speaking with my mom, there were no big holes that any non-readers should have. It was a good adaptation, which is more than I have said for any book-to-movie adaptations I have seen in the past (save for Harry Potter, but even then it took them several movies to find the right feel of things).

Ultimately, I do not feel like I took anything away from the film that wasn't already satisfied by the books, save for having a visual cemented in my head as far as the look of the Districts, The Capitol, and the characters (but that's to be expected). I do recommend seeing it in the theater if you are able, because visually it looks great on the big screen.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Do robots dream of electric sheep?

Wed, 21 Mar 2012 06:40:50 GMT

Wedding happened. I will get around to talking about that eventually.

I've been feeling really down lately and I have no idea why. But that seems to have mostly passed and so I am looking super forward to the next few months, which will be filled with awesome movies and perhaps a visit back out to look at rocks with Becki.

And because I really don't have much else to say because my life is boring, have a really rough wip: (Avengers movie-verse, Clint/Coulson for the CC Feelsmeme)

There's no one in his office when Agent Coulson returns from lunch, but that doesn't stop him from lecturing as he opens his inbox.

"You can't just drop out of the ceilings on top of people, Barton. We've had this talk before. You shouldn't even be in the ceilings to begin with."

There's a small scraping sound from above and then one Clint Barton drops down in front of his desk. "Don't knock it 'til you've tried, Phil."

Coulson doesn't bother looking away from his screen. "I'm not saying you don't enjoy it, Agent Barton. Just that it's an inappropriate use of SHIELD time."

Barton rolls his eyes and drops into the chair opposite. "Come on, boss. Haven't you ever wanted to go somewhere where no one could bother you?"

"That's what home is for, Barton."

"No offense, sir. You live with the rest of us in the mansion. People call you our babysitter. You don't get time off from work."

"Are you asking me if I regret accepting my position as liason to the Avengers?" Coulson glances away from his computer in time to catch the other man catapult a paperclip into his ceiling. Barton meets his gaze with a half-hearted shrug.

"Is that what I said?"

He resists the urge to roll his eyes and maybe throw something at Barton and instead returns to the message he's typing to Agent Periman that yes, he is required to fill out and turn in all 76 pages of Form 4247-B and no, the fact that his cat had supposedly licked the whole packet into oblivion was not a valid excuse because that form should not have left HQ at all and cats were banned from the premises since Loki's last "visit."

"Do you need something?"

He sends an email to Agent Ishikara ("If your partner fails to bring me Form 4247-B by the end of the week I will allow Tony Stark to appropriate your car for robot experiments." Except not really, because he is a consummate professional and has no need to make such obvious threats.) as Barton folds more paperclips into projectiles.

"Clint."

Clint launches another paper clip into the ceiling.

"If there's something you want you're going to have to verbalize it."

"Do you regret accepting your position as liason to the Avengers?"

They're his words, thrown back to him almost verbatim, and even though he's been expecting this conversation to happen at some point--and soon--he's still thrown by Clint's bluntness. (He really shouldn't, not after all these years, but Clint is always finding new ways to surprise him, intentional or not, even if Phil doesn't allow himself to advertise how often it happens.)

It takes him too long to forumlate his response, and he can see the shift in Clint as he finally answers.

"If you're asking if I regret having to move out of my apartment, where I lived with my partner and could have regular uninterrupted sex, to live in a bedroom in the Tony Stark Ego Pad where I am no longer allowed to have private life, the answer is yes. I regret it more than anything I have ever done in my life and I wish I had the foresight to have insisted that I be allowed to maintain a permanent residence away from the rest of your psychotic team mates.

If you're asking if I regret accepting a job where I get to spend the majority of my time with superheroes, including Captain America, or if you're asking if I regret getting involved with you, then the answer is absolutely not. Besides," he says, turning back to the growing number of emails in his inbox, "someone's got to look after you."

"You are such a fanboy."

"Don't tell Stark."

A paperclip bounces off his screen. "Come on, don't you think I owe him one for not hassling us?"

"I'm pretty sure he hasn't even realized we're married yet."

"He's a genius--"

"--billionaire playboy philanthropist who just so happens to be more concerned with following Captain Rogers around like a starstruck teenaged girl than he is with noticing anything about my personal life."

"You're just jealous."

"Of Captain Rogers?"

"Of Stark. You know he's going to be the one to de-flower our national treasure. It breaks your heart."

"And that's as far as this conversation is going."

"Yessir, bossman."

The next few minutes are spent with Coulson forwarding and replying to messages, pausing every so often to glare at Barton for embedding paperclips in the space above his head.

Now I am going to find some way to get my cat off me (she is huffling in her sleep and it is so adorbs) so that I can go to bed because it is late like whoa.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 02:51:43 GMT

I'm helping someone grade chem labs because she is short on time and I am short on money. But I saw this and it just cracks me up and I thought you guys would appreciate it.

Describe what you see and explain why it happened.
It boils. My fiery passion ignites it's fluids & makes them flow

I. am. cracking. up.

falls over

Mon, 20 Feb 2012 17:52:37 GMT

oh fuck I am done with Hogsmeade. I entered all the things. I am kind of shocked that I was able to do it.

Now I am going to go focus all of my energy on not falling over since I am at work. I kind of want to have a dance party to celebrate. But you know. Work.

My life in bullets:

Fri, 17 Feb 2012 03:07:28 GMT

- I need to finish the bouquet for Lauren's rehearsal dinner on Saturday but instead I am on tumblr

- I really need to finish it before Hogsmeade kicks off

- I am sad that I am going to miss out on so much of it because I have the dinner on Saturday night and then have to work all day Monday.

- I have been watching a lot of Hoarders: Buried Alive and America's Supernanny

- Lori is awesome and I may be able to go to a con sometime over the next year thanks to her

- I somehow DESTROYED MY WRIST by hitting it against the corner of my chest of drawers. I bled everywhere and now I have a bump there and it hurts to move it.

- I really love eating. Like, I get so much joy from having food in my mouth. I am not ashamed of this and I refuse to eat anything unless it brings me joy.

- I am gaining weight and can almost fit into some of my old clothes. Yay.

- The Unusuals is really good. Go watch it.

- I bought some special heart-shaped marshmallows to eat on Valentine's Day and then promptly forgot I had them. Did not open them until yesterday. Oh well.

- Valentine's candy is only 25% off over here. WHYYYY.

- I can't wait to see Sarah next month~

- I have spent the last two weeks feeling mostly like shit for a variety of different reasons. First it was not migraines then it was not sleeping well and then it was my stomach. As soon as all of that crap stopped popping up, one thing after the other, the cats decided that I needed to wake up at 5 am every morning.

- Jeremy Renner's arms. That is all.

Cross-posted from my dreamwidth. Comment here or there.